Snakes, Handball, and Jack Stone will haunt America’s dreams
Tonight the “Bachelorette” consisted of various twists and turns: some resulting in widespread joy among viewership, while others simply igniting gut-wrenching, cringe-worthy reactions. The oh-so-common theme in television is that drama thrives on conflict, yet the tone of conflict in this season of the show has been dreadful to endure.
It is well-known that Rachel Lindsay is the first black bachelorette in the show’s history, which could’ve easily led towards intellectual, thoughtful conversations regarding race in America. However, ABC decided to stray away from this approach, encouraging the racial tension that has encapsulated this season, mostly through the contestant Lee.
Although there was not direct motivation on the show’s side in regards to Lee’s racist tendencies, there is no denying the complete and utter failure on their behalf for choosing him as a contestant in the first place. This was especially apparent after multiple racist and sexist tweets by Lee were recently brought to light. Drama between the contestants creates must-see television, which is why ABC can’t be criticized for casting problematic individuals, but let’s not confuse Corrine taking naps with a racist chastising every black male in his sight.
We idiot Americans hear the word ‘Handball’ and immediately think of that frivolous game that children play in school. Since we are inferior to other countries, especially Norway, we can’t be blamed for this common misconception, but we need to learn from our errors.
Handball is an Olympic sport that shines a spotlight on some of the most athletic nonathletic people on earth. Who wouldn’t love multiple 5’9’ white men dressing in unitards and prancing around while throwing a ball in a goal? Do you suck at soccer and wish you could simply pick the ball up and throw it into the goal? Then Handball is for you!
Also, it should be noted that it is very likely this group of “Bachelorette” contestants would have most likely beaten the professional handball team practicing before them. Anyways, the game still looks fun.
Loser: Jack Stone
It can’t be disputed that Jack Stone (cross between Abercrombie model and serial killer) was a massive loser in this episode, for multiple reasons.
The first reason is that he might possibly have the creepiest smile displayed on television ever, and it has been haunting my thoughts for weeks. His smile is an unconventional creepy; his teeth are so perfect that it wouldn’t be surprising if he ripped them out at any second. Part of me was worried that he would surprise Rachel by removing his false set of teeth prior to kissing her, but thankfully he chose to keep them in.
Another factor into Jack Stone receiving a massive F on his report card this week were the glares he consistently gave the camera and everyone around him. Smiling with your head tilted down is a mistake in any setting, but especially when you’re attempting to convince a woman to marry you. That kind of facial expression is one that Disney movie villains make when cultivating their devious, evil plans, so naturally Rachel was frightened when Mr. Stone used this look in a failed attempt to win her over.
Oh, and lastly, beginning a sentence with, “First, I would lock the door,” is repulsive always and forever. He said this before describing a figurative hang out session between him and Rachel, in which they would push all the furniture to the sides of the room in order to allow for an ideal conversational atmosphere. And besides the sheer creepiness in Jack’s plans, this fantasy is incredibly excessive.
Provocative conversation can be had almost anywhere: bowling alleys, Taco Bells, nursing homes, etc. So with that simple fact being established, why would one need to designate a whole room for talking? What is the need for pushing the furniture to the sides of the room? And why the hell do you need to lock the door? Unless Jack Stone is planning on integrating sporadic wrestling matches on the floor, these strange requests don’t fly with me (or Rachel).
Winner: Peter & Hot Tubs
Tonight displayed producer intervention in its fullest capacity during the finality of the group date. Rachel ‘decided’ to give her rose to Will, a charming, intelligent contestant who happened to destroy everyone in the handball game. However, it was clear who really won Rachel over.
Rachel is guilty of always wearing her emotions on her sleeves (and face), which makes for absolutely amazing television. These telling facial expressions displayed her affection for Peter during their time alone, and she expressed her desire to kiss him constantly.
When he brought up that they had a lot of ground to cover, in terms of getting to know each other better, she suggested that they cover this ground in the hot tub. Peter humbly obliged to this request.
When they returned to the group, one of the contestants playfully shouted that they were gone for hours, which Peter casually laughed at. And despite the fact that Peter didn’t get the group date rose, every contestant was well-aware who was really leading the competition.
Biggest Loser: Snakes
Lee was called a snake multiple times by various people this episode, which really didn’t sit well with me. Sure snakes are slithery, cold-blooded, disgusting, and dangerous, but I still don’t agree with Lee being categorized as a snake: he is much worse than that.
Snakes typically only attack humans in effort to defend themselves, often times after shedding or when guarding their nest. Even some venomous snakes give ‘dry bites’ which scares a human off without injecting venom into their system. Yet Lee attacks those who he deems as vulnerable, and he makes sure that his bites will leave them wounded.
Another key difference is that snakes don’t consider race when attacking an individual, but this cannot be said for Lee. As his fellow contestant Dean pointed out, Lee only goes after those who don’t share the same skin color as him (black men).
Lee perceives black men as aggressive, manipulable, and enjoyable to agitate. While some may claim his actions are not blatantly racist, his true feelings on black people were exhibited in his tweets, such as one that claimed the BlackLivesMatter movement is a terrorist organization.
Racism in present day America typically isn’t shown through aggressive chants of the N-Word or fist fights between races. Instead it is more commonly seen through acts such as Lee’s. When a white individual clearly patronizes and belittles black people is when racism needs to be called out for what it is. This is dangerous, especially due to many simply chalking this alarming behavior up as indifferent or a matter of opinion.
So yes, snakes were undoubtedly the biggest loser of the night for unfortunately having to be compared to an intolerant, despicable human being.