First dates are awkward AF, but some ideas push the limit; don’t try these truly terrible ones at home


The one thing you don’t get on a first date to the gym is gains. The one thing your date doesn’t want is to get sweaty and talk about his or her eating schedule.


Screening an X-rated movie is never a good idea for the first date. There is nothing more awkward than watching two people get it on, unless a marriage’s love life is just that sterile. That’s like saying “you know what we’re doing later? wink wink.” We don’t need the warm-up porn gentlemen.


A family event is a de nite NO. Nothing like a little pressure for the first date. Maybe after a few months of dating. Ma- ma’s boy.


Going to a strip club … seriously? This one does not need explaining. Don’t even bother. Your date does not want to watch you smacking your lips at half-naked girls with daddy issues. And trust, you’ll never score with her friends, they will be warned.


Going to a reunion, any reunion is also a bad idea. It makes your date uncomfortable. They don’t know anyone and it is just awkward. Plus, chances are that there are plenty of embarrassing stories your date should not hear as a first impression.


A wedding for the first date is a bit presumptuous. Plus, it will scare the living hell out of your date. More than half of the ceremony she will be planning the best exit route.


A funeral, because nothing is sexier than people mourning and the casket of a dead body. Yeah baby, get it. No, that is just wrong, stop before it’s too late.


Any fast food restaurant is just a terrible idea. Greasy, fake meat is what you eat after a night out of drinking, not a night out on a date. Don’t be a cheap ass, feed her actual food.


Hanging out with the guys. Yes, she totally wants to sit there with a beer she probably doesn’t even like, as you talk about chicks, sports and play videos games… on the first date. She does not want to hang out with your bros, at least not just yet. The entire point of a date is to get to know that person, so go do that and introduce her later on.


Going to the Club is a de nite no-no. The two of you will be screaming at the top of your lungs the entire time trying to talk and dirty dancing will be awkward. If you want to dance, then go somewhere else. Grinding is not sexy, nor is it impressive.


A work party. These events are always lame, sorry. And she does not want to meet your co-workers. Hopefully, you have other friends and don’t just hang out at work all the time anyway.

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Nanny, travel/Disney enthusiast, and journalism major. Transferring to Cal State Monterey in Fall 2017.

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