What horror do the stars project?

Aries // March 21 – April 19: Relationships are incredibly important to you, Aries. It’s definitely not the time to go camping with your friends in a cabin in the woods or muttering words from creepy books in a basement. Use your time after the full moon on June 28 to be introspective about which projects you deserve recognition for. Not receiving any sense of acknowledgment from your friends and acquaintances would be the perfect purgatory for you. Start thinking about why your closest friends might consider “ghosting” you all summer. Are you too arrogant, stubborn, or confrontational? Your relationships might be catching onto this, dear Aries.

Taurus // April 20 – May 20: Besides being dependable, patient, and persistent, the stars also see you as a person with financial power, devout Taurus. Would being trapped in a mall, full of hungry zombies, fall into the category of your largest dreams? You would certainly have access to multiple objects that signify monetary success. Consider how materialistic you can truly be. Are you self-aware of the self-indulgent creature the stars project you to be? The new moon on June 13 has created a change towards your goals and aspirations.

Gemini // May 21 – June 20: Oh Gemini, you are afraid of making choices because of your complete lack of consistency. Games that involve a simple choice are definitely not your strong suit. If a philanthropic millionaire invited you to a dinner to play a macarabe version of Would You Rather, would you feel more inclined to make choices or would you let other individuals make life-changing choices that could affect your life and the number of limbs you possess afterwards? Try using the June Solstice on June 21 as a means to reinvent yourself. Instead of not making choices, consider saying yes to any choice presented. Not only will this change your lack of consistency, it will change your lack of direction as well.

Cancer // June 21 – July 22: Leaving home would be quite the pestilence for you, Cancer. You are a homebody, a hermit, an emotional recluse if you will. Change brings out your clingy, over-emotional, and pessimistic nature. Use the new moon on July 13 to assess whether your natural tendency to stay at home will prove to be helpful at the end of the day. Would you be able to avoid a situation where a creepy duo dressed in white hold your house and family hostage with the threat of clubbing you with golf clubs? Consider installing a home security system, if you already haven’t been inclined to.

Leo // July 23 – August 22: Sigmund Freud was probably inspired to write about the ego and the id because of you, headstrong Leo. Imagine being so self-absorbed and selfish, like a synthetic android whose interest lies in murdering anyone in their path of furthering a certain alien species. By promoting your narcissistic agenda, not only will you drive the human race to extinction, but there will be no one to hear your ideas or purposely ignore you; which, can prove to be freighting in itself to you, Leo. The new moon on July 13 brings forward a new love interest. Try not bombarding them with your unhealthy ego. You are not the center of everything, even if you would like for that to be true. Consider it a time to be a little selfless.

Virgo // August 23 – September 22: Oh Virgo, your enjoyment of mind games gets truly tiring at times. Be careful to choose occupations that require you to be creative. Your tendency to be over critical, fastidious, and judgemental will only push you closer to your fear of imperfection. There is no fun in being inventive, imaginative, or innovative if it leads you to be a ballerina that experiences hallucinations because of their overwhelming goal of achieving artistic perfection. The partial solar eclipse on July 13 will not affect you too much as a mutable sign. However, consider using it to mark an end or change of your perfectionist nature.

Libra // September 23 – October 22: Your indecision will be the end of you, detached Libra. Your ability to change your mind multiple times and have the perfect reasoning for it certainly makes you seem both lazy and unreliable. Consider that your indecisiveness has the ability to scare even those closest to you. Would you have the ability to survive becoming entrapped in a magical, legendary Maryland forest with a hangry witch running amok all by yourself? Consider how your flaky demeanor could very well get you into this specific situation. The full moon on July 27 can drive an influence to develop healthier communication with your relationships. This might be the perfect time to be a little less frivolous.

Scorpio // October 23 – November 21: You love to dominate, manipulative Scorpio. That trait is simply a cover for your fear of intimacy because you cannot simply trust others. Try handing the commanding influence onto someone else for once. However, be careful in who you choose to trust. Strangers over the internet would not be the best choice when trying to learn how to exercise your trust. Worst case scenario: the 24-year-old you have prematurely declared your love for might be a 78-year-old who just learned how to use the internet and watched an episode of Catfish. Use the full moon on April 28 to question why you avoid being or becoming close to other people. Oh, right it is your overwhelming fear of intimacy again.

Sagittarius // November 22 – December: There is a large amount of importance in being honest rather than nice for you, blunt Sagittarius. You can be incredibly tactless, impatient, and careless. Your overconfidence can certainly have the tendency to put your foot in your mouth during several occasions. But, you do have fears and weaknesses, regardless of how hard you try to bury that truth under the sand. Enclosed spaces do not work for you, dear Sagittarius. When choosing your words, consider being trapped in an elevator with the demonic human being you are speaking to. Would being confined and trapped with them change your need to be bluntly honest? Use the new moon on June 13 to reflect on whether your mouthy habits could use change or compassion for once.

Capricorn // December 22 – January 19: Oh crybaby Capricorn, you sure know how to exude the personality of a stubborn, shy, and pessimistic child. Despite how practical and disciplined you can be towards your career and educational goals, that still does not stop you from being a heavily reactive element. Imagine a colleague and yourself are inclined to design business cards for your business. Your counterpart drafts a sleeker and better design, whereas you are still in your head envisioning yours. Would murder really help you come out on top? Consider assessing whether your projected sense of failure is true and accurate to real life failures. The full moon on June 28 might allow for some much needed R&R. All work and no play sure does make Capricorn quite the dull stinker.

Aquarius // January 20 – February 18: The stars portray you as an unpredictable person, dear Aquarius. Consider this a positive and negative attribute. Your curious nature multiplied with your tendency to go off-track make this quite the disastrous trait if not aligned properly. Consider haunted houses, sites, areas, and premises off limits this summer. Becoming stuck inside such buildings or places while recording the phenomenon with your friends is highly probable for you, Aquarius. The summer solstice will have you metaphorically buckling down. Use that time for insight on what your positive and negative attributes truly are. Again, no haunted places pal.

Pisces // February 19 – March 20: The realization of your goals and aspirations commonly includes some actual work and responsibility, little dream baby Pisces. Your lack of accountability and fear of actually getting your hands dirty make you the least best person to receive superpowers. Yes, you know how to be selfless and have empathetic and emotional capabilities. However, the idea of multiple people or a whole city depending on you for their survival is enough to have you running or sleeping away from your problems. The new moon on June 13 will make you consider fixing this essential defect in your character. Afterwards, maybe you might realize that with great power comes great responsibility.

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About Author

Ashley Hern

Ashley Hern is the Spring 2018 editor-in-chief of Lariat, the student-run newspaper, as well as part of the editorial staff for Orange Appeal. She is looking forward to a career in public relations, using not only the reporting and writing skills she's learned, but with the leadership skills as well. She enjoys reading, playing with her dog at the beach and watching Sci-Fi movies.

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